We Must Fight On

When I thought about what I would turn to and meditate on for the next 100 days, I went back to the one scripture following the election that stirred my soul. It was not one of the usual Catholic prayers, Bible verses, hymns, Jesuit daily prayer podcasts, meditations or any other spiritual practice I have relied on for years. Instead, it is the lament of “anguish and praise,” of Psalm 22 that begins.

“My God, my god why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me,

So far from my cries of anguish?”

The week after the election, Faith in Public Life's CEO, Rev. Jennifer Butler, read Psalm 22 at the start of our staff meeting. The poetic words of anguish, confusion and plea to God unexpectedly brought tears I could not hold back. The words reflected my true feelings.

“I am poured out like water,

And all my bones are out of joint;

My heart is like wax;

It is melted within me.

In the days after the election, I have coped by throwing myself into work, acutely aware of the short timeline before everything could change. I felt like there was a tsunami of danger coming for the people I love, and I did not have time to stop and cry.

When I heard Psalm 22, all of the fear, anger and sorrow in my heart poured out. I was beginning to accept that I could not stop the flood and could only turn to face it head on.

In the last few weeks, I have had glimpses of God’s work and presence in community gatherings, hugs from friends, and some quiet moments. However, I have also felt angry and afraid, wondering where is God at this time. I’ve struggled to draw on my faith and spiritual practices. King David’s words are what I need now, for me, and in my prayers for my community, my friends, family, colleagues, neighbors- all brothers and sisters in this struggle.

King David’s lament is both a reflection of where I am right now and a reminder that many generations before have wrestled with God and their faith in the struggle for justice and freedom. That as we cry out for God’s help, we also will proclaim our faith,

“For he has not despised or scorned

the suffering of the afflicted one;

he has not hidden his face from him

but has listened to his cry for help.”

And in the end, though we may not see it yet or even soon:

“They will proclaim his righteousness,

declaring to a people yet unborn:

He has done it!”